Zach ([info]xeerohour) wrote,
@ 2008-05-14 22:43:00
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Living in the moment
I've felt the need to really sit down and write for quite a while now, but having the need is different from having the time and the motivation.

If you genuinely care about what I have to say, I ask that you break from reading this entry to follow this link, and read about the first ten paragraphs of this article. Once it gets into the in depth sports part, you can come back. Just read the beginning.

Go ahead, I'll wait.

Back yet?

Ok, now?

Alright. Well, that article hits on the head exactly the problem I've been dealing with over the past few months - I've been having a VERY hard time just living in the moment, ignoring the other concerns of my life.

I could go into detail as to why this is such a bad thing, or why its so hard for me, but really, that doesn't matter. My basic problem is that its damn hard for me to turn off my mind, so I always require SOMETHING there to fully engage it. Be it a group of friends, a cubs game, a good movie, whatever - I need something in depth to basically use up all my spare CPU cycles. When I don't have those items immediately available, my mind starts to wander, and it affects my ability to think happy thoughts, and to truly enjoy the moment I'm in.

My question for you guys is this: Does that happen to you as well? If so, how do you deal with it? How can you keep yourself focused on the moment?

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[info]vadius
2008-05-15 03:41 pm UTC (link)
I don't see why you have to "turn off your mind" to live in the moment and enjoy yourself. If I am not using my brain and concentrating on something, then why am I even doing what I am doing?

I consider the times when I am actively engaged, mentally, with something to be the moments that I live for.

I'm not one to stop and smell the flowers. Hell, an animal can do that. Shouldn't we strive for a little more in our lives?

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[info]xeerohour
2008-05-20 11:41 pm UTC (link)
There's nothing wrong with striving, as long as you can appreciate what you've strived for. I work very hard to accomplish the things I want, but I want to still be able to step back and enjoy those rewards without having to worry about what's next. Does that make sense?

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[info]marymcglo
2008-05-15 05:38 pm UTC (link)
I hear ecstasy is good for that. :-)

As I'm sure you could guess, "living in the moment" doesn't happen to me all that often, and that doesn't really bother me. I'm a boring person, but a relatively happy one, believe it or not.

Instead of trying to force my future-thinking brain to stop thinking and beating myself up when I can't control it, what works better for me is to arrange my life in such a way that when I *do* start obsessing about the future that I feel I have something to look forward to, so I'm occupied with happy thoughts. Sometimes it means changing direction, and other times it means changing my attitude. And if I can't identify any real cause of unease, changing a routine, even a little one (for me this means buying a different kind of breakfast cereal, but your mileage may vary), helps to get out of a rut. It makes me able to tell myself, "I have the ability to change my life, so if shit happens later I can fix it."

That said, life gets pretty dull when I go a long time without *ever* "just enjoying the moment", so I do try to get a steady supply of running through the park, beer and french fries, and spending time with people I like.

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[info]xeerohour
2008-05-20 11:43 pm UTC (link)
There's some very good advice in there - I think we all need to take time to step back and enjoy the small things that make life worthwhile.

The wording that caught my attention there is the "I feel I have something to look forward to" - how do you do that? How are you always able to set a new goal, a new step?

I guess my biggest issue is that I've started to feel like I'd accomplished the goals I had worked years for, and now I'm struggling to set new ones.

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[info]deepochre
2008-05-16 12:12 am UTC (link)
Zach, that's a really cool article you found. Have you ever seen the movie 'ihearthuckabees'? They do a lot of talking about that moment, the main characters try to achieve it through different means, sex included of course, but the best scene is when they have one of those gym class red dodgeballs and hit each other in the face to reach that "in-the-moment-no-other-thoughts" feeling. You know I'm into Buddhism a lot, and most Buddhists agree that this is the goal of meditation. It's not so much to turn off your mind, more like focusing your mind on, like you said, just the present moment, accompanied sometimes with a feeling of love or compassion or acceptance. Desires manifest as a idle thoughts monkeying around in your mind. Cool the monkey thoughts, cool the desires, ~ simplicity and happiness. How does someone do this?? Hah, beats me, I've been trying for a while too. The thing that I try and tell myself is that only the present moment matters, the past is past and the future will be a present moment someday, you can deal with it better then. When you can make every moment, even the most mundane, like a game-winning shot or a delicious bagel and lox, you've reached enlightenment.

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[info]xeerohour
2008-05-20 11:46 pm UTC (link)
Henry, I miss talking to you man. That's some awesome advice, and I wish I knew more people that had your point of view.

I'd never thought of meditation like that - I always assumed it was a way to focus on your own thoughts, and that never appealed to me because I do that already. It's pretty rare I'm NOT acutely aware of what I want, what I crave, what I'm worried about, and what's next. However, recently, it's been tough to identify all of those things. It's just like I'm constantly stressed, worried about the future, worried about money, worried about finding the time to do everything I need to do.

I wish you could shed more light on the "cool the thoughts" :)

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[info]deepochre
2008-05-22 05:46 am UTC (link)
My dad introduced me to "Getting Things Done" the book and productivity system by David Allen. I think it's very minimalistic and effective - don't let things rattle around in your head, put everything down on paper or schedule it - basically schedule time to worry about things, and all you need to do is worry about checking your schedule itself.

Cool the thoughts -- umm, hmm. It's tough, yeah. I think just focusing on whatever's in the present moment. Trying to think about nothing is damn hard, but doing just one thing in the present is a little bit easier. The worst is driving, commuting, waiting etc. when thoughts tend to wander. During those times I try to focus on my breath ... when I remember, heh. :)

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